It is amazing that we take our life for granted everyday. We expect that everything is going to remain the same in our secure little world. In the blink of an eye death can occur, and change our lives forever.
At age eleven, I was carefree and innocent. Never before had I experienced the death of someone in my family.
A Sunday evening about seven years ago, we received a phone call from a family member, letting us know that my cousin, Jason, had been taken to the hospital after a bad car accident. I remember my parents discussing what had happened. Jason and his family had just finished attending church, and everyone was making their way outside. After an argument with his girlfriend, Jason had left in his car towards home. Several other friends from church, including his girlfriend and his parents, were on the road not far behind him. This stretch of road was a dangerous one. It was narrow and curvy, and traveled at high speed by many. Those who traveled it frequently sometimes took this danger for granted. Jason was one of those people. He pulled into the opposite lane to pass, and before he could get back into his own lane, suddenly, a car coming from the opposite direction was right in front of him. They hit head on. Jason’s car rolled over an embankment and landed in a field. I vividly imagine the anguish and the fear that his girlfriend and his parents must have felt when they came upon the accident, and went down to his car to find Jason pinned in the wreckage, and badly hurt, but still alive.
Later, the second call came informing us that he had died. This was the first time that I had to deal with a death in our family. I recall my mom and dad having conversations about this tragedy. They couldn’t understand how someone so young and full of life could be gone in an instant. Everyone was very upset, especially Chris, my oldest brother, who was very close to Jason and had worked with him in an orthopedic sales business. The morning after the accident Chris was so distraught that he pulled right out in front of a car while on his way to work. After hearing all the conversations and feeling the pain that my family felt, I couldn’t convince myself to go to the funeral services. I wanted to remember Jason as I knew him, not as a lifeless body lying in a casket.
As hard as the loss was for friends and family, it was devastating for Jason’s parents. You see, he was their only child, and at the young age of twenty-three, he was no longer with them. When they would visit with us we would talk about their lives before and after Jason. Everyday his dad still gets up and puts on Jason’s class ring, necklace, and bracelet. His mom has created a small room in their new house as a memorial to Jason. He is still very much a part of their lives, in decisions that they make, and places that they go. Both of Jason’s parents hold a strong spiritual belief that has helped them to deal with living without him here on this earth. They know that they will see Jason again, and that’s what gets them through each day. God has also blessed them with a son that they adopted four years ago. It is amazing to see how much he favors Jason, and his parents, in his looks and personality.
Over the years I have came to the understanding of death and how it affects everyone in different ways. I am reminded every time that I see Jason’s parents what a loss that they have suffered, but also what a wonderful blessing they have received in their son, Anthony.